Overcoming the Puppy Blues

By Allie Sadowski

Allie is a member of the GLPG Marketing team and a contributor to the Current and the Notepad.

Bringing home a new pet is often portrayed as a joyful and heartwarming experience. Cute cuddles, wagging tails, and endless puppy kisses – what’s not to love? However, many new pet owners find themselves feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or even regretful after welcoming a puppy into their home. This is commonly referred to as the “puppy blues.”

If you’re experienced the puppy blues, know that you’re not alone. Many new pet owners go through a period of adjustment as they navigate the challenges of raising a new pet. Understanding why this happens and how to cope can help you regain confidence and strengthen your bond with your furry friend.

What are the puppy blues?

The puppy blues describe the feelings of stress, anxiety, and sadness that some people experience after bringing a new puppy home. This emotional response can be surprising, especially if you’ve been looking forward to pet ownership.

Common feelings associated with puppy blues include:

• Overwhelm from constant care and attention needs
• Sleep deprivation due to nighttime whining and bathroom breaks
• Frustration with house training and destructive behaviors
• Guilt for feeling like you’re not bonding with your pet as expected
• Regret or questioning whether you made the right decision
• Feeling as if you’re on the verge of crying often

These emotions can be confusing, especially when you expected joy, excitement, and bonding. This mismatch between expectation and reality can make the experience feel even more isolating. In many ways, the puppy blues are similar to the feelings associated with postpartum depression. A huge lifestyle change occurred and suddenly, a living being is 100% dependent on you. It’s a lot, and you’re not alone if you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Why do the puppy blues happen?

Several factors can contribute to the puppy blues, including:

• Disrupted routine: Pets require significant time, effort, and attention. The sudden lifestyle change can feel overwhelming.
• Lack of sleep: Many new pet owners struggle with disrupted sleep schedules due to nighttime potty breaks and whining.
• Behavioral challenges: Accidents in the house, biting, chewing, and excessive energy can be frustrating, making you feel out of control.
• Feelings of isolation: Caring for a new pet can limit social activities, leading to loneliness and frustration.
• Unrealistic expectations: Social media and movies often portray pet ownership as an instant bond filled with love, leaving many new owners unprepared for the hard work it entails.
• Loss of freedom: Spontaneous outings, sleeping in, and lazy weekends may be off the table for awhile. Many people grieve the loss of their previous lifestyle when adjusting to life with a puppy.

How long do the puppy blues last?

The duration of the puppy blues varies from person-to-person, but most people experience it during the first few weeks to a couple of months after bringing their puppy home. Typically, the most intense feelings show up during weeks 2-4, when the novelty of the new furry friend wears off.

For many, the puppy blues get better as:

• The puppy begins sleeping through the night
• Potty training improves
• A routine becomes more manageable
• The bond between the owner and puppy strengthens

However, if the feelings of sadness, regret, or anxiety continue for more than a few months, or if they begin to interfere with your daily functioning, it may be helpful to talk with a mental health professional.

The rule of 3’s with puppies

There’s a helpful concept in the dog training world known as “The Rule of 3’s,” which can provide perspective and patience during the adjustment period:

• 3 days: During the first 3 days, your puppy is likely scared and trying to figure out their new surroundings. They may hide, act out, or display stress behaviors.
• 3 weeks: At approximately 3 weeks in, your puppy is starting to settle in. You’ll begin to see more of their personality. You may also begin to see behavioral challenges emerge, too. This is a great time to start consistent training and bonding.
• 3 months: At approximately 3 months in, your puppy is beginning to feel like part of the family. You’ve likely established a routine, seen progress with training, and built a bond. Things start to feel more manageable.

Keeping this timeline in mind can help you recognize that the puppy blues are temporary. Things often improve with time, consistency, and support.

Managing feelings of regret

It can be incredibly difficult to feel regret after bringing home a puppy, especially if you spent time researching and preparing. Many people find themself thinking, “Did I make a huge mistake?” or even, “Should I rehome my puppy?”

Feeling regret doesn’t make you a bad person. Regret is often tied to emotional overload. When you’re running on little sleep and big responsibility, it’s easy to second-guess your choices. Here are a few ways to help you manage feelings of regret:

• Give yourself grace: You are doing something both new and hard. No one is perfect, especially during the early puppy days.
• Take breaks: Ask for help when needed, even if it’s an hour away while someone watches the puppy.
• Remind yourself it’s temporary: Puppies grow up fast. The exhausting, overwhelming phase won’t last forever.

How to cope with the puppy blues

If you’re struggling with the puppy blues, here are some ways to cope and make the transition smoother:

• Set realistic expectations: Remind yourself that pets require time and patience. The early stages are demanding, but as your pet matures and learns, things will become easier.
• Establish a routine: Creating a structured daily routine can help both you and your pet adjust.
• Use enrichment activities: Mental stimulation is just as important as physical exercise. Puzzle toys, sniffing games, or frozen Kong toys can keep your puppy engaged and give you a much-needed breather.
• Consider training support: Whether it’s online puppy classes or a certified dog trainer near you, professional support can help you feel more confident – and accelerate your puppy’s progress.
• Prioritize sleep and self-care: Lack of sleep can worsen stress and anxiety. Whenever possible, try to to take naps to catch up on rest.
• Seek support: You’re not alone in this experience. Join online forums, connect with other pet owners, or seek professional training. Talking to others who have been through it can be reassuring.
• Practice positive reinforcement: Celebrate small wins, whether it’s your pet learning a new command or making it through the night without accidents. Acknowledge your own progress and be kind to yourself.
• Consider professional help: If feelings of anxiety or sadness persist, talking to a therapist can provide guidance on managing stress and adjusting to your new role as a pet parent.

Takeaway

The puppy blues can feel overwhelming, but they are temporary. As your puppy grows and you both learn from each other, the challenges of pet parenthood will ease. If you’re struggling, give yourself grace – adjusting to any big life transition takes time.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, our network of therapists are here to provide support. Choose a licensed, local therapist at findmytherapist.com and schedule your first appointment directly online.